The NFL Is Going Global, Baby—Pack Your Bags, Grab Your Passport, and Don’t Forget Your Foam Finger

It’s official: The NFL is now the international over-sharer of the sports world. Not content with simply dominating Sundays in America, the League just announced it will spread itself across four continents this fall like a grease stain on a brand-new white T-shirt. Seven games. Seven cities. And about seven million opportunities to mispronounce “Bernabéu.”

Kicking it all off on September 5 in São Paulo, Brazil, the Los Angeles Chargers will christen the season in the Corinthians Arena—opponent to be named tomorrow because, in true NFL fashion, they know how to keep us emotionally hostage. Picture it: caipirinhas, samba, and Justin Herbert flinging rockets under the South American sun.

Then—hold on to your Guinness—the Steelers and Vikings crash into Dublin on September 28 at Croke Park, which sounds like a pub but is, in fact, a stadium. From there, the Vikings take their carry-ons straight to London to play the Browns on October 5. That’s two countries in two weeks. These men are professionals. Meanwhile, London isn’t done with us yet. Jets vs. Broncos on October 12 and Jags vs. Rams on October 19 at Wembley. If the Queen were still alive, I like to think she’d be mildly annoyed at the traffic.

Fast-forward to November 9 in Berlin where the Colts host the Falcons at the Olympic Stadium. Yes, that Olympic Stadium. If you don’t tear up thinking about Hoosiers taking on Dirty Birds in Germany, check your pulse.

And then, November 16, we arrive in Madrid. Dolphins vs. Commanders at the Bernabéu. Nothing says Spanish football like… American football. The paella will be hot, the sangria will be flowing, and somewhere in Miami, Dan Marino will nod approvingly while grilling shrimp in his backyard.

Seven games. New cities. New fans. New excuses to call out sick on Monday morning. The NFL is throwing a passport party and you are invited. Tickets go on sale this summer, but emotional investment starts now.

Find your game at nfl.com/internationalgames. And for God’s sake, start practicing your foreign cheers. “Let’s go Dolphins!” just doesn’t translate the same in Spanish, but you know you’re going to try.